Suddenly It All Changes

Claremont Hotel, Berkeley, California

I’ve been praying for peace and tranquility for so long that it is a reflex. I do it in the car at the red lights, while brushing my teeth, or even just rushing down the stairs on my way out the door in the morning.

On Friday, Paris came home for the weekend. I picked her up from the airport and when she got in the car, I said, “tell me everything.”

A few days before, I could feel a definite shift. The light was brighter and all of the edges had sharpened as if coming into focus. The colors had softened to blue, white and yellow.

The clouds hung gently over the San Francisco Bay as I exited the Caldecott Tunnel. I could see the view of Treasure Island and San Francisco magically laid out before me. I was on my way to meet my business partner for martinis and oysters at the Clairemont Hotel to celebrate our progress with Ocean SF.

We sat outside in the warm sunshine and looked toward to city. The sky was a perfect cerulean blue, and everything had a freshness like I had never seen before. Andrew, wore a blue and white striped shirt and I could see the reflection of myself in his mirrored sunglasses. It was one of those rare moments in life where you feel perfectly content as if everything lay in front of you, and nothing behind.

I have become an observer in my own life over the past year. I like to watch how things unfold. Truthfully, I am not always calm while doing this, and people close to me have witnessed some of the moments when I am out of sorts with my circumstances, but it’s a practice to allow change and not resist it.

When we got home from the airport, Paris sat on the kitchen counter and talked as I made dinner. She is someone who is excited about ideas and exudes passion as she speaks. She is a whirl of philosophies, personalities, topics and opinions. As I watched her face, I could see she is maturing. Her eyes are a deeper blue, and her smile is a smile beneath a smile, that of a young woman, and no longer of a girl.

Change can be excruciatingly slow. Then, one day you are there.

In my 20’s I was stunned and amazed to be sitting on a train in England wearing a herringbone coat traveling toward my first economics class at the University of London. It took ten months to apply, and work toward that goal, but I eventually arrived, and the long rain soaked days at Oregon State University became just a memory.

When Paris was home, we had a dozen people for dinner. We sat in our formal dining room among friends and candle light, everyone was laughing.  It felt as if it had always been this way.

Love and blessings to all.

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